How Instant Messaging helps our family stay close

As some of you may know I am a long distance dad and my daughter who is about to turn 10 lives in France some 8,000km away. We see each other about 4 times a year and talk almost daily. Mostly this has been via telephone calls and regular Skype/FaceTime calls and more recently email.

With her recent visit I gave her my old iPhone 4 and set the phone up with her email. But I also got her connected to WhatsApp and Viber and got her address book updated with her family and friends' details both here and in France. What happened next was truly amazing.

Firstly she took to the phone like duck to water and was able to navigate around the device with supreme ease. (That by-the-way is a true reflection on how brilliant Apple has been to create as Mike Elgan recently put it "the most bullet-proof, elegant and seamless experience in existence.")

But what surprised me more was that she began to lifecast her visit to South Africa. This was her first experience with a phone but it seemed as if she had been doing this for ages! Which lead me to thinking how technology is helping families stay close despite great distance at times. Because she had a mobile device with a camera she could share her experiences as they happened and gave those not with her an opportunity to be ambiently aware of how she was feeling and what she was thinking. This type of connection is something I have really longed for as a long distance dad, the ability to be connected this way and have her share her daily experiences. I am 100% sure that the whole instant messaging experience made her feel more connected to those who were not in her immediate presence and more especially so during her flights to and from South Africa!

When speaking to her gran (who just turned 75) about what it meant for them to be connected with their grand daughter via WhatsApp she made this observation about using instant messaging:

"It's a more direct personal contact whereas email is more impersonal. With WhattsApp you can in brief bursts of conversation ask and tell a whole story in a very descriptive way! Long drawn out questions and answers are not necessary and it felt as if we were talking to her directly, as in a normal conversation! Also you can connect to each other from anywhere! You can share photos immediately where with email it's cumbersome to add photos."

Of course with WhatsApp (as with the other messenger apps) you can not only share a photo, but also video and audio notes which makes for a rich instant experience. It's such an efficient lifecasting tool! No wonder as Scaly in their Instant Messaging vs Email infographic indicate that 70% of teenagers say that they send more IM's than they do email! It definitely is a more personal experience.

Our family has adopted this form of communication quite extensively. We have a Facebook Group where my brother, sisters and I discuss my aged mother's frail care logistics. We have a very vibrant family WhatsApp group, where the family - which is spread out all over share updates about what is happening with them. There is no question that this instant messaging makes us all feel more connected and in the moment with each other, which is awesome.

Here she is lifestreaming one of her shopping experiences in South Africa with her mom in France :) 

If your family is separated by distance, how do you keep in touch? What technology do you use? What has your experience been?